Hope As A Habit

It's a Sunday evening and I'm reflecting on the week getting ready for the Monday. I feel the keyboard calling to me to document an experience that affects me now as it did to so many others twenty years ago. The ipod is playing on my pink portable player, Elton John & This Train Don't Stop There Anymore, the mood is set and the words flow through me to the screen.

An evening celebrating the life & legacy of Ryan White with a special performance by Elton John. I was fortunate enough to be invited by a member of Ryan's family and get a closer look at how one little boy changed a nation. The story of Ryan White is displayed in an inspirational exhibit called The Power of Children: Making a Difference at The Children's Museum of Indianapolis. There was an ABC TV movie special and in the late eighties up until 1990 Ryan White was a household name. He changed the face of AIDS , and from fear and ignorance there became knowledge and acceptance. But as I have learned people tend to forget and there is this generational gap of those who have never heard of Ryan White. This is why the 20th anniversary marking his passing is so important. His story is retold and he is remembered and he continues to inspire.

The evening started out as cocktails at the Children's museum with Jeanne (Ryan's Mom) there with support from her family, friends (Phil Donahue included, he hosted a special Ryan White Talks to Kids About AIDS in 1988) and community supporters. Having a member of his family near my ear I was able to have special people that were in Ryan's life pointed out. The nurses and doctor that held the press conferences during his treatment were all gathered . The man who helped Ryan get back into school after a legal battle and the best friend that he met because of those who fought and granted his wish to live like a normal child. All these people gathered together again after twenty years. Jeanne thanked all those people who helped make a difference in her family's life while photographer's and news media documented her walk down memory lane.

This entourage then traveled to Clowes Hall. The Ryan White monologue was performed by actor Fred Zanto who performs for The Children's Museum at The Power of Children gallery. Phil Donahue explained his special connection while presenting video clips and introducing actress Judith Light (she portrayed Ryan's mom in the ABC movie), she then presented video messages from Nancy Pelosi, Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives and U.S. Senator Orrin Hatch. Judith also spoke of her connection with the family and introduced Jeanne White-Ginder.

Jeanne walks on the stage hand in hand with her daughter Andrea and the room applauds, it doesn't die down but increases into a full standing ovation. The words she speaks touches the soul of every mother when she speaks about a mother's greatest pain. The loss of a child. She is moved to tears when she explains that time never heals the hurt of that loss but that you simply learn to survive the next day. She proceeds to tell the story of Ryan's last week of life and the angel she felt Ryan bestowed upon her. That angel was Elton John. When Ryan was asked to name a celebrity that he would like to meet the answer had been Elton John. I don't think anyone would have realized how intertwined their lives would have become. Ryan admired Elton's ability to be different without fear of what others thought. So that last week of Ryan's life in the hospital Elton was there as well. He became the buffer to all the media calls, the secretary to organizing Jeanne's schedule, the room decorator to uplift Ryan's spirit, and the friend that delivers a 5 gallon bucket of Jeanne's favorite Sunburst ice cream. Jeannie introduces her angel....Elton John.

While Jeanne's words were heartfelt and tearful, Elton's were passionate and informative. He reveals that his deeds were not without reward. The family changed his heart, he realized that he complained about trivial things and was a spoiled celebrity being and that Ryan in his near death state never uttered a word of complaint. The family was able to forgive even those people who were so filled with hate that they shot at their home in order to exile the White family from the community. The White family fought for their rights and won . The family was kind and had a christian attitude he just couldn't comprehend. He explained that he would have wanted to bestow revenge and the fact that the family did not confounded him. He goes on further saying that the family of Ryan White not only changed his life but saved it. This year marks the 20th anniversary of Ryan White's death but it also marks the 20th anniversary of Elton John's sobriety. The speech was incredibly personal and he laid out his feelings for the whole crowd to feel as well as inform of all the foundations that are now in existence all because of one little boy. The Elton John AIDS Foundation(EJAF) is one of the leading nonprofit HIV/AIDS organizations and has raised $220 million to support HIV/AIDS prevention and service programs in 55 countries around the globe. He goes on to explain the significance of songs and how when he plays them it takes him back to the that time and some songs he just is unable to play, until tonight.

This night is about remembrance and he begins, in his words "the boring part of evening". The audience laughs because we all know that the songs are highly anticipated. The night in filled with ballads that envelop Clowes Memorial Hall, even the security is enchanted and turn a blind eye to the flashing cameras that are not allowed. The music pulses throughout your body and the thought of ever having to settle for radio versions is unthinkable, this is how Elton John should be heard. He plays one last song and declares that he never leaves crowd with a ballad but on a high note. The whole room is up on their feet and dancing and singing..la lalalala la lalalala...........

The evening is wrapped up in a nice dessert reception filled with a less sombre mood and more socializing. This gives Jeanne a chance to catch up with people and they are all vying for her attention and photo opportunities. The night dies down and the photographer is finally able to wrangle the many members of Ryan White's family. I am able to thank Jeanne for the ticket that gained my entrance into this unforgettable evening and I thank her now for the courage that she faced to keep hope as a habit.